Child Experiences
Child experiences can be described as the events that take place in the life of a person during childhood. The experiences are defined by the events that take place within the child’s environment. They can be positive or negative. A child is expected to have experiences that help build his/her sense of belonging and connection. According to Prevent Child Abuse Arizona (2022), when a child has positive experiences, the child will have good health and can record success in school. Positive child experiences boost health in childhood and adulthood. The experiences promote the physical, social and emotional growth of the child. On the other hand, negative childhood experiences deter the chances of good health and success. Family violence is a significant source of negative child experiences.
Family Violence
Family violence is any form of neglect, abuse, or mistreatment that a person experiences from a family member or from anyone with whom the person is having intimate or family relations. A behavior that is abusive, coercive, or dominating between members of a family or people in current or past intimate relationships is considered family violence. The behavior makes the victim develop fear (Usher, Bhullar, Durkin, Gyamfi, & Jackson, 2020). Family violence has a significant effect on every member of the family, both the perpetrators and victims. Children are particularly negatively affected because of their vulnerability. The violence produces a home environment in which the children are constantly in fear (Violence Intervention Program, n.d). Children that live in an environment characterized by violence often have negative experiences. Studies have shown that the experiences have a devastating impact on the child’s development and behavior (Daines, Hansen, Novilla, & Crandall, 2021).
Prevalence of Family Violence that affects Children
UNICEF has produced worrying data on children exposed to family violence. The data shows that about 250 million children aged between 2 and 4 years globally are experiencing violent discipline. The number accounts for about 6 in every 10 children (UNICEF, 2017). These children are disciplined by physical punishment. This kind of discipline is mostly administered by parents, guardians, and other childcare providers. The data shows that many children are direct victims of violence from family members and other sources (Noble‐Carr, Moore & McArthur, 2020). However, children can also experience family violence without being the direct victims.
This happens when they live with parents and care providers who experience violence from their partners or former intimate partners. The UNICEF (2017) report furthermore shows that more than 176 million children who are below 5 years of age are living with a mother who has experienced or is experiencing intimate partner violence. In the United States alone, about 15 million children are living in dwellings where family violence has been experienced once or multiple times (Basile, Jones & Smith, 2021). The high prevalence of family violence also affects children of other ages. For instance, about 15 million girls aged between 15 and 19 years have been forced into sex globally (UNICEF, 2017).
Forms of Family Violence that affect Children
Family violence comes in different forms. The violence includes emotional abuse, physical abuse, economic abuse, and psychological abuse (Sternberg, Baradaran, Abbott, Lamb, & Guterman, 2006). Emotional abuse usually begins with verbal attacks. The culprit uses verbal attacks to humiliate and belittle the victim. As a result, the victim develops fear and feels worthless (Violence Intervention Program, n.d). Physical abuse commonly comes in the form of punching, pushing, slapping, scratching, restraining, and kicking. Economic abuse is when a partner is not given the opportunity to control their own finances or achieve economic success. On the other hand, psychological abuse involves saying or doing something that will make the victim of abuse develop fear. All the various forms of violence within the family have a negative bearing on child development and behavior.
Family Violence and Child Experiences
Studies have shown that there is a relationship between childhood experiences and the well-being of a person (Daines, Hansen, Novilla, & Crandall, 2021). Family violence is a source of child experiences whose impact on the child cannot be underestimated. Generally, this kind of violence makes children develop emotional, behavioral, social, and physical problems (Usher, Bhullar, Durkin, Gyamfi, & Jackson, 2020). Emotionally, children develop grief as a result of family, and personal losses. Children often get confused with conflicting feelings towards their parents involved in family violence.
In some cases, children feel that they are responsible for the violence that persists in their families. As such, the children can develop guilt, shame, and self-blame. A feeling of guilt and self blame for violence at home is common in the school-going age (Basile, Jones, & Smith, 2021). They try to reason out the causes of constant family conflicts and abuse.
Family violence creates negative child experience that is associated with adverse social and emotional health (Daines, Hansen, Novilla, & Crandall, 2021). For example, the children find it difficult to express their emotions. This can be due to the feeling that expressing their emotions can trigger more violence on them or either of their parents. Besides, family violence creates an environment where family members do not have the freedom of expression, especially emotional expression. Children may lack a listening ear or face opposition from the intended audience.
Still, on emotional problems, children in violent families can fear possible personal injury, the unknown, or being abandoned. Family violence can lead to personal injury or separation of partners leading to the abandonment of children. The outcome of the violence may also be unpredictable. These situations create fear in children. Additionally, the children can develop anger toward the parents and the entire situation. They can also suffer from depression and a feeling of powerlessness, hopelessness, and embarrassment. Prevent Child Abuse Arizona (2022) identifies that trauma occasioned by adverse childhood experiences increases the chances of being obese, having poor health, and developing depression.
In terms of behavior problems, a child that is exposed to family violence can act out or become withdrawn. The child may also become excessively passive or aggressive. Sometimes the child finds it difficult to attend school. Going to school becomes a problem because of the fear of what might take place at home in his/her absence of being unable to cope with the school environment. Even for the ones who attend school, participation in school activities becomes a problem (Basile, Jones, & Smith, 2021). Older children easily find themselves taking up the role of their parents care taking. The child acts as the parent’s substitute. To ensure personal safety, the child can become a liar. Lying can be used as a strategy for avoiding confrontation. Another way of trying to ensure personal safety is by mounting rigid defense. A child that is not able to defend himself or herself can easily become a victim of family violence.
Other behavior problems include developing excessive attention seeking tendencies. This may be aimed at compensating for the lack of attention at the family level. It can also be due to excess attention that the child has with either of the parents. In some cases, violence is meted by a parent to another parent over the child. In such a case, one parent may become over protective giving the child much attention. Once the child gets used to the attention, he/she becomes excessive attention seeker. Bedwetting and nightmares are some of the behaviors that are exhibited by children who are disturbed, especially the children with emotional torture. According to Basile, Jones, and Smith (2021), children who are experiencing domestic violence can start exhibiting behaviors that they had at a younger age such as wetting their beds, sucking their thumps and crying.
Children can be considered as stubborn or difficult because of the environment in which they live. They become out of control in their behavior because of lack of parental guidance at home and also emotional problems that are associated with exposure to family violence. It is important to note that the children who come from violent families are associated with lower intellectual competencies compared to their counterparts from stable families. The outcome can be linked to disturbed mind that is anxious and cannot concentrate on learning new things (Daines, Hansen, Novilla, & Crandall, 2021). The children are equally fond of manipulation, have mood swings, and register high level of dependency.
Children from violent families usually have distorted social life. They tend to portray isolation from their relatives and friends. The isolation can be attributed to their tendency to avoid people. Isolation usually complicates the situation for children exposed to family violence because it depletes the opportunities for support networks from the community or individuals from outside the family setup (Usher, Bhullar, Durkin, Gyamfi & Jackson, 2020). When they grow up and decide to be in relationship, violence characterizes the relationship. They have stormy relationships.
Similarly, their relationships tend to be exploitative. The child becomes the perpetrator or the victim of exploitative relationship. According to the Office on Women Health, children who observe violence between the parents or guardians stand a greater chance of becoming violent partners in their future relations (Basile, Jones, & Smith, 2021). The child develops mistrust, especially to adults because of constant conflict between the parents. In some cases, the violence they experience is perpetrated against them by adults whom they are supposed to trust.
Despite being isolated from relatives and friends, engage excessively in social events or places with the aim of avoiding home. By staying away from home, the child expects to reduce exposure to violence perpetrated against them at home or against their family members. When the children stay at home, the contact with perpetrators of violence intensifies (Usher, Bhullar, Durkin, Gyamfi & Jackson, 2020). The risk of neglect and domestic abuse increases at home. Family violence makes a child passive with his/her peers. The child becomes a bully at school or when interacting with other children. Generally, children from violent families are poor in managing anger and solving problems.
Violence usually comes with physical damages to victims. The children often exhibit headache, stomachache, and body pain. The children are frequently ill, tired and lackluster in addition to being nervous and anxious. They also have a short attention span, which can be linked to anxiety (Daines, Hansen, Novilla, & Crandall, 2021). Family violence can make children high risk players and show self abuse. In many instances, the children are not able to maintain good person hygiene. Generally, the child has regressed physical development. It is important to note that many children who are experiencing violence at home are also subjects of perpetrators of physical abuse.
Conclusion
Family violence can be perpetrated on a child or other members of the family. Regardless of the intended victim of the violence in the family, the violent behavior leaves behind a trail of destructive effects on the family members. Sometimes the negative effects go beyond the family members. Importantly, the child has to be affected. A child who is witnessing violence against a family member and the child who is a direct victim of family violence are both affected. From several studies, it is evident that any form of family violence offers a ground for negative child experiences.
A child in a violent family has adverse child experiences. The child develops emotional, behavioral, social and physical problems that arise from persistent fear, poor health conditions and sometimes physical injuries. Devastation sets in for the child because he/she does not feel free to communicate with the family about personal feelings. The child feels lack of support from family and friends when needed, does not have a sense of belonging and lacks protection at home. These are some of the child experiences in a violent family that leads to behaviors that can make the situation worse for them. For instance, the child would not share his/her concerns to get help from parents or community. Withdrawal from healthy social activities and school activities may make it difficult to make friends and learn with the rest of the peers. As a result, the child becomes emotionally distraught and socially disconnected. It hinders opportunities for growth and the general well-being of the child. Children should not be exposed to family violence as this poses adverse impacts on their current and future well-being.
References
Basile, K. C., Jones, K., & Smith, S. G. (2021). Effects of domestic violence on children. U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, Office on Women’s Health. https://www.womenshealth.gov/relationships-and-safety/domestic-violence/effects-domestic-violence-children
Daines, C. L., Hansen, D., Novilla, M. L. B., & Crandall, A. (2021). Effects of positive and negative childhood experiences on adult family health. BMC Public Health, 21(1), 1-8.
Noble‐Carr, D., Moore, T., & McArthur, M. (2020). Children’s experiences and needs in relation to domestic and family violence: Findings from a meta‐synthesis. Child & Family Social Work, 25(1), 182-191.
Prevent Child Abuse Arizona (2022). There is Hope: Research Shows Positive Childhood Experiences Combat the Effects of Childhood Trauma. https://pcaaz.org/there-is-hope-research-shows-positive-childhood-experiences-combat-the-effects-of-childhood-trauma/
Sternberg, K. J., Baradaran, L. P., Abbott, C. B., Lamb, M. E., & Guterman, E. (2006). Type of violence, age, and gender differences in the effects of family violence on children’s behavior problems: A mega-analysis. Developmental Review, 26(1), 89-112.
UNICEF (2017). A Familiar Face: Violence in the lives of children and adolescents. https://data.unicef.org/resources/a-familiar-face/
United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (2019). Violence against Children. https://www.unodc.org/e4j/en/crime-prevention-criminal-justice/module-12/key-issues/2–the-impact-of-violence-on-children.html
Usher, K., Bhullar, N., Durkin, J., Gyamfi, N., & Jackson, D. (2020). Family violence and COVID‐19: Increased vulnerability and reduced options for support. International journal of mental health nursing.
Violence Intervention Program (n.d). The Effects of Domestic Violence on Children.
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