Introduction
The book, When Breath Becomes Air, is a concise memoir and biography of a neurosurgeon, Dr. Paul Kalanithi. The book mirrors the life of Kalanithi as a first-generation Indian-American and reflects on the life struggles and achievements of his immigrant parents during the 1980s. The book demonstrates the plight of many immigrants, who worked tirelessly, invested much in education, and supported their children to strive for better lives and bring out the best in themselves. In significant instances in the book, Kalanithi portrays himself as having a good attitude toward life. He attributes most of his productive times to building the future, in what he loosely refers to as ‘building potential.’ Throughout the book, Kalanithi battles stage four lung cancer and still has to tend to patients who equally need his attention as much as he needs the attention of other physicians. Death is not a rite of passage but an inevitable event every human has to undergo; people tend to process or perceive death differently (Puji Lestari and Thoyibi 5). The paper discusses and examines how people perceive the elements of death and dying, emphasizing assertions in the book, When Breath Becomes Air.
Paul’s Perception of Death/Dying
As the tradition holds, death is still taboo even in modern-day society, and people are often very uncomfortable talking about or discussing death. In the book, When Breath Becomes Air, the neurosurgeon Paul Kalanithi learns that he has stage four cancer, and chances are high that his life will one day come to an abrupt and sad end; he was sure he would die someday due to his unfolding health condition. However, Paul Kalanithi was determined not to get distracted by such bad news about his mental condition and therefore decided to write down all his plans for himself, his patients, and most importantly, his young family. At some point in the book, Paul regrets not writing something that people would see, or at least remember him with, after he would have gone (died). “The good news is that I have already outlived two Brontes, Keats and Stephen Crane. The bad news is that I have not written anything”. However, writing could not have been easy at that point, as Paul’s condition deteriorated faster than he could control (Nishad et al. 85). Ideally, unlike other people, Paul had foreseen his death, and he had few options but to start preparing for it; people perceive death differently, and Paul, he was more than ready when his time came.
Gender and Death
Based on gender, males are incapable of dealing with or processing the idea of death or dying like their female counterparts. According to De Muijnck (45), males are generally “emotionless” due to societal expectations. Society does not, at any point in time, expect men to show their emotions or vulnerabilities. However, women get emotional and can offer emotional support to others, making them very efficient and effective in dealing with death or the idea of dying; they learn to accept and be content with death. In the book, Kalanithi, seemingly weak, shares his thoughts and feelings about the now-permanent medical condition he is undergoing. For Paul and everyone reading the book, terminal cancer came when Paul, his wife, and young daughter least expected it. The diagnosis would turn out to be a game changer and wholly altered how Paul viewed life and what his hard-earned career or profession had to offer him. Paul had a constant and unrelenting urge to be robust against, not only for himself but also for his family and patient; the operating theatre is the place he had owned for the better of his life as a neurosurgeon.
Sadly, Paul’s parents, too, could not process the idea that time was up for Paul, and they would eventually lose him to the dreaded disease, lung cancer. As a son, husband, father, and medic, Paul had so much potential to offer to change humanity, save lives, and bring peace to where there was peace; “building potential.” Remarkably, several factors inform people’s perception of death or life after death. According to De Muijnck (50), career is one thing that can make people not accept or process the idea that one day or one time, they will perish and leave behind their promising careers and future; it is pretty difficult for a majority of people to think about such occurrences, leave alone even holding discussion or debates about them. Paul was passionate about his career, which he worked hard to earn. However, terminal cancer could not get off his head, and the thoughts of him dying or losing the battle with cancer someday were very lively in his head. Therefore, Paul was racing against time to accomplish whatever he had to before his time came; he was slowly accepting and agreeing to the reality and idea that death is inevitable and his time has come.
Culture and Death
Since immemorial, humans have struggled to exist or survive with limited resources. Therefore, the risk of dying has become increasingly higher than it is today. The risks of people dying from accidents or diseases are considerably high at any stage of life. Therefore, both younger and older generations suffer a similar fate. In Paul’s case, he gets diagnosed with terminal lung cancer in his mid-thirties and embarks on a journey to accept death with utmost grace. Paul knew he would not survive cancer, and he resorts to pages of the book When Breathe Becomes Air, where he tells his story but also enlightens people on what it means to be alive or the meaning of life. Paul confidently talks about the suffering that comes with death- “With what strife and pains we come into the world we know not, but it is commonly no easy matter to get out of it” (Triyoga et al. 182). At this point, Paul was encouraging those he would leave behind to take every step they make seriously, for death is ever awaiting and is inevitable; no one is immortal. Paul would also admit that the illness has made him accept that his main goal is not all about saving lives because everyone dies but guiding the patients and, most importantly, his family to understand and accept terminal illness or death.
Many cultures perceive death and dying as a conclusion to a fruitful and long life, whereas others view death as a painful end to someone else’s dear life; hence they may find it hard to accept or contemplate it. In the book, Paul is not much worried about death or dying, but the connection and passion he will lose with humanity, his family, and his patients when he finally dies; he had invested so much in getting to where Paul is, and able to save other people’s lives was an outstanding achievement that Paul wished he had another chance bring more of such changes to people. However, at some point, Paul succumbs to the cruelty, desperation, meaninglessness, and isolation to which death can subject its “victims.” Also, Paul realizes that people will grieve him when he dies, and losing human connection would be more significant to his family than anyone else (Triyoga et al. 185). Paul broadly worries about his parents, wife, and young daughter, who strives to grow into a responsible woman.
Conclusion
Humanity still grapples with the idea that, eventually, everyone will die when the time comes. In most societies, it is even taboo to contemplate or talk about death or dying. Moreover, for some societies and cultures, death is a conclusion to a life well-lived or well-served, a time for the old generation to depart and hand over the button to the next generation (young). In Paul’s memoir and biography, he details his journey from medical school to his achievements in transforming humanity through his career as a neurosurgeon. Paul feels he is dying a hero and honorable man. Culture, religion, and gender are significant factors that inform how people perceive death and dying. Some cultures and religion prohibit people to contemplate or “prepare” for death. Women are emotional in nature, and that speaks to how well they can contemplate death, or process it when it occurs. Men are naturally emotionless, an idea that society imposes on them. Therefore, society does not expect men to show their weakness or vulnerabilities, meaning, they should not talk about death or dying.
However, he deeply regrets that death is not a good experience for anyone with a purpose in life and, most importantly, is “building potential”. Ideally, Paul spent much of his time planning for the future, an idea he regrets in the book. According to Paul, he wishes he could live longer to save lives in the operating theatre. Essentially, no one can adequately prepare for death or dying, and peoples’ perception of death still varies, especially with the significance or position one holds in life. In many cultures, it is considered more painful when young people die than when older adults die. Also, the perception of death or dying revolves around the quality of life people live, not how long they lived or should have lived. Therefore, people come into terms that they are immortals, and someday they will perish; death is unavoidable occurrence or event.
Works Cited
De Muijnck, Deborah. “’When Breath Becomes Air’: Constructing stable narrative identity during terminal illness.” Colloquy 38 (2019): 44-69.
Nishad, P. M. A., Ravichandra Karkal, and Anil Kakunje. “When breath becomes air.” Kerala Journal of Psychiatry 33.1 (2020): 85-87.
Puji Lestari, Fitri, and M. Thoyibi. Positively Facing Death Reflected In Paul Kalanithi’s When Breath Becomes Air (2016): A Sociological Perspective. Diss. Universitas Muhammadiyah Surakarta, 2020: 1-20.
Triyoga, Arilia, and Apriyana Kartika Putri. “The manifestation of death as seen in Paul Kalanithi’s When Breath Becomes Air: A psychological approach.” UAD TEFL International Conference. Vol. 2. 2021: 182-185.
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