Writing about one’s life and philosophies has grown more common in recent years, with many authors choosing memoirs as a vehicle. Two such memoirs that strongly describe the Black experience in America are “Heavy” by Kiese Laymon and “Zami” by Audre Lorde. This paper will examine the similarities and differences between these two works from a Black feminist perspective, drawing on themes from both.
This article will focus on one of Laymon’s core topics, addiction, examined throughout “Heavy.” Laymon discusses his battles with substance abuse and overeating, as well as his issues with alcoholism and bulimia. Similarly, Lorde’s “Zami” explores the effects of addiction on interpersonal relationships and the author’s personal experiences with alcohol.
Blackness, identity transformation, embodiment, bondage and liberation, economics and social stratification, education and parenting, maternal and mental health, spirituality and sexuality, sisterhood and friendship, and traumatic experiences are other topics to be discussed. These ideas are central to both Laymon’s “Heavy,” and Lorde’s “Zami,” and they shed light on the layered and multidimensional realities of Black people in the United States.
Wallach’s argument, presented throughout this dissertation, that memoirs and memory are political is also considered. Memory and memoirs are powerful tools for social and political transformation, and by analyzing how Laymon and Lorde do so, we can better understand this.
Black Abundance
The concept of Black plenty refers to the widespread prosperity and success of the African-American population. It is a term used to describe a future in which Black people are liberated from oppression and institutional racism to reach their full potential. Kiese Laymon’s “Heavy” and Audre Lorde’s “Zami” in different ways both examine the idea of Black plenty. This section will analyze the two memoirs regarding how Black prosperity is depicted.
Through his struggles with substance abuse, trauma, and structural racism, Kiese Laymon examines the concept of Black plenty in his essay “Heavy.” He argues that genuine prosperity for African-Americans includes monetary success and psychological and spiritual fulfillment. In her book, Laymon says, “The pursuit of abundance is an exercise in loving ourselves enough to ignore everything that’s ever suggested we weren’t enough” (Laymon, 2018, p. 156). Black Plenty, according to Laymon, is letting go of the falsehoods and preconceptions about Black people that white supremacists have propagated.
Black affluence in “Zami”: In “Zami,” Audre Lorde depicts Black affluence as a sort of resistance and resiliency in the face of oppressive social standards and expectations. Lorde, a Black lesbian in the 1950s and 1960s, describes how she found prosperity in her relationships with other Black women. For the first time, she explains, “we were learning to cherish each other’s dreams as our own, and to work for them as if they were our own” (Lorde, 1982, p. 172). Lorde defines Black Plenty as the collective success of people of African descent in the face of adversity.
Despite their differences, both “Heavy” and “Zami” use the concept of Black abundance to challenge oppressive social norms and reclaim cultural heritage. Nevertheless, their definitions and methods for attaining Black affluence are distinct. While Laymon stresses the value of inward reflection and acceptance, Lorde highlights the strength of group efforts and mutual aid. While Lorde is concerned with social and political change, Laymon’s concept of Black abundance focuses on mental and emotional well-being.
The notion of Black abundance is a recurrent motif in both “Heavy” and “Zami,”; however, it is handled differently in each work due to the unique experiences and viewpoints of its respective author. Both books show that Black prosperity is about more than money; it also includes emotional and social health, strong social networks, and the will to fight against oppression. The authors Sarah Brophy and Janice Hladki (2010) point out that “the telling of memoirs and life stories can be both an act of resistance and a celebration of abundance” (p. 7). Laymon and Lorde add to the discourse by sharing their experiences of being Black and plentiful in a culture that so frequently tries to reduce and erase Black people.
Motherhood is “Heavy” and “Zami”: A Comparative Analysis
Both “Heavy” and “Zami” focus on motherhood and examine how a mother’s capacity to parent might be affected by her experiences with abuse and trauma. The two memoirists discuss this same issue differently; Kiese Laymon’s “Heavy” focuses on his connection with his mother as a recovering addict, while Audre Lorde’s “Zami” centers on her relationship with her mother as a Black lesbian.
Effects of Abuse on Motherhood in “Heavy”
In “Heavy,” Laymon investigates how his mother’s addiction affected her parenting. To quote what he says about his mother: “My mother was her own altar and her addiction was the sacrifice” (Laymon, 2018, p.8). The fact that Laymon was frequently left to fend for himself or take care of his younger siblings as a result of his mother’s drug abuse had a significant influence on his childhood. Laymon’s mother was still a big part of his life, and he struggled to balance his feelings for her with the damage her addiction was causing.
Effects of Abuse on Motherhood in “Zami”
Lorde, a Black lesbian, uses the song “Zami” to delve into her tumultuous relationship with her mother. The latter’s commitment to heteronormativity and white supremacy strained the connection between Lorde and her mother. “It was terrible to face my mother’s wrath,” Lorde explains, since she might have taken her life. However, my mother’s suffering and frailties molded me; I must investigate these to understand them all (Lorde, 1982, p. 28). Lorde acknowledges that her mother’s sorrow and hardships shaped her into the person she is today, despite the difficulties in their relationship.
Comparison and Contrast
Abuse and trauma may have lasting effects on a mother’s capacity to parent, and both “Heavy” and “Zami” examine those effects. Lorde’s mother was a Black lesbian, and whereas “Heavy” examines the impact of addiction on Laymon’s mother, “Zami” delves into the more nuanced connection that Lorde had with her mother. The writers of these two autobiographies show how the effects of abuse and trauma may be felt for generations and how they can interfere with a person’s capacity to develop positive bonds with others.
Exploring Sexual Coming-of-Age Experiences
The stories of “Heavy” and “Zami” deal with the universal experience of sexual maturation. Lorde’s biography presents her sexuality as central to who she is, whereas Laymon’s narrative shows how his horrific upbringing influenced his sexual encounters.
Lorde’s first sexual experience is a crush on her best friend, Gennie, when they are young. When Lorde was 13 years old, their friendship became sexual. The event was formative because it gave her the confidence to accept her sexuality. It was Gennie who told me I could be beautiful, intellectual, and sexy all at the same time,” Lorde explains in her essay. I became a lady on that day” (Lorde 62). Sexually, she has had transformative experiences that have freed her from conventional norms and helped her become who she is.
On the other hand, Laymon’s sexual history is riddled with pain and embarrassment. His history of sexual assault as a youngster has left him with a lifelong need for porn and sexual activity. Laymon said, “I was addicted to the endless escape that masturbation provided from the trauma of molestation and the trauma of living in a world where molestation was routine” (Laymon 184). Addiction is a frequent issue in Laymon’s biography, and it reveals how his upbringing has shaped his views on sexuality.
The Role of Setting in Each Memoir
Each memoir’s environment is crucial to understanding the author’s life and development. In “Zami,” Lorde weaves together her sexual awakening with her time spent in Greenwich Village, New York, during the ’50s and ’60s. Lorde felt comfortable expressing her sexuality and connecting with others who understood her in the city’s thriving LGBT culture. I was no longer alone,” she writes. All around the city, I had brothers and sisters fighting beside me” (Lorde 126). Lorde can finally accept and love herself in the liberating environment of the city.
In “Heavy,” Laymon’s life is affected by his suburban Jackson, Mississippi neighborhood. The book depicts a racially and economically stratified world in which the author and his family are among the struggling middle class. Suburbia is a metaphor for the systemic racism and classism influencing Laymon’s life. As he puts it, “Everything in my neighborhood had been invented to make sure we felt and acted smaller than we actually were” (Laymon 46). The historical context in which this narrative is situated exemplifies the devastating effects of systemic racism on the lives of Black people.
Comparison in both “Heavy” and “Zami”
In both “Heavy” and “Zami,” the authors show complicated mother-child relationships involving mental and physical abuse. Both writers can love their abusive mums and place the abuse within the greater framework of historical trauma and cultural forces. For instance, Laymon considers the role that intergenerational trauma and institutional racism had in shaping his mother’s addiction, while Lorde considers how colonialism affected her mother’s mental health. Both authors’ mothers are portrayed as multifaceted and flawed but ultimately dependable support pillars. Through their portraits of mothers and daughters, Laymon and Lorde draw attention to how Black women are frequently expected to deal with injustice and violence inside their own families.
Having finished our analysis of the memoirs “Heavy” by Kiese Laymon and “Zami” by Audre Lorde from a Black feminist perspective, we have shown how both writers struggle with racism, gender, and power by examining topics like Black identity, addiction, sexuality, trauma, and motherhood. We have learned more about the lives of Black people, especially Black women, and the effects of oppressive systems via the prism of memoir.
As this article has shown, memoirs are “a powerful source of knowledge and memory” and useful for examining the political and social contexts in which individuals find themselves. These memoirs remain relevant to modern themes of social justice and equality. The significance of placing Black women’s experiences at the center of debates on race, gender, and power is emphasized throughout this article.
Works Cited
Laymon, Kiese. Heavy. Scribner, 2018.
Lorde, Audre. Zami: A New Spelling of My Name. The Crossing Press, 1982.
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Wallach, Jennifer R. Memory’s Politics: Writing and Remembrance in the Age
of Globalization. Duke University Press, 2010.
Watson, Emma. “Sexual Identity Development in Black Women.” Archives of
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